006 - 🚙 - I missed driving
In 200 meters, turn right (or left, whichever way you want)
Yesterday, I found myself on a long, slow drive—slow, thanks to the obvious southbound traffic. It hit me then, how much I’ve missed this — driving not out of obligation, but to meet a friend, work notifications muted, heading somewhere a few hours away from home.
In my early twenties (the fact that I can even say that now is still wild to me), driving was my form of therapy. One day a week, I’d get in the car and just drive. I let myself drift, quietly, into thoughts I never shared.
My car —Monty, iykyk— became my safe space. It’s heard everything: conversations with myself, riffs I didn’t dare sing aloud anywhere else, the whispered secrets between friends, sudden breakdowns, quiet victories, and the precious two minutes of stillness before stepping back into the world.
Last night, as the only car on a dimly lit highway, I realized just how brave (and reckless) my younger self had been, navigating this road without prescription glasses. I'm 110% sure my guardian angels were working overtime then.
I thought about the parallels between then and now. Back then, I was scrambling to assemble the puzzle pieces of a life I barely understood, anxious to have everything figured out (very baby Aries of me). Last night, though, it was different. I was content just being here, acknowledging both my failures and progress.
On the way home, I felt this deep trust that whatever’s guiding me knows exactly where it’s taking me, even if I take occasional detours or side quests, something good is waiting for me.
Current driving playlist
Here's a brief list of what I’ve been listening to lately, gathered from a mix of playlists.
1. Loving You - Michael Jackson
2. Time - Olivia Dean
3. Drive - The Cars
4. Moment - Victoria Monét
5. TAKE A CHANCE - DOMi & JD BECK, Anderson .Paak
6. Can’t Take My Eyes Off of You - Lauryn Hill
7. Golden - Jill Scott
8. Give Me Another Day - Jalen Ngonda
9. Can’t Get You - JAEHYUN
10. I Drink Wine - Adele
11. Older - Lizzy McAlpine
12. Untitled (How Does It Feel) Cover - Elmiene
A little bit of everythingeverything
A Record of A Night Too Brief by Hiromi Kawakami has found a home in my favorite bag. I’ve been in the most disappointing reading slump, and I’m glad I’m reading again. The book starts with “What was that itch on my back? I wondered. And then, I realized it was the night—the night was nibbling into me.” — how could you not continue reading?
For the past two/three years, I’ve been refining my “personal style,” and after three weekends of relentless spring cleaning, I realized my wardrobe is mostly made up of basics, with the occasional ~play~ coming from my shoes. Right now, my favorites are a pair of penny loafers my mom bought me years ago, which I recently found buried under my bed — sorry, mom.
Lately, I’ve kept up with my daily journal, and one theme keeps surfacing: gratefulness. What have you been grateful for lately?
I know these letters come in pulses, but thank you for being here.
Your friend,
Gia